The Mary Favre Story

THE MARY FAVRE STORY

On a fantastic fall day, October 27, 1953, in Lake Forrest, Illinois, the world welcomed an energetic baby named Mary Elizabeth Harrington. Mary would be the third child born for a total of eight. She has six brothers and one sister.

Mary did not stay in Illinois long. The family moved to Roswell, New Mexico, in 1962. After that, the family moved to San Angelo, Bangs, Abilene, and Dallas, Texas, all before she was in high school.

In  November 1966, the family’s house caught fire! Mary was asked to live with her and an uncle in California during the adjustment. That is where she started high school. But before long, Mary longed for her brothers and moved back with the family to Arlington Heights, Illinois. She continued her high school education until the middle of her sophomore year when they moved to Bryan, Texas. There, Mary started her first job serving hamburgers for $1.25 an hour when she was 15.

In August 1970, the family moved to Houston, Texas. Mary started her senior year at Sharpstown High School but technically had to graduate from Stephen F Austin High School in Bryan, Texas. In the spring of 1971, Mary’s father had a stroke, and her mother had to go back to Chicago to take care of him, leaving Mary to take care of the youngsters at home and make sure they had childcare, meals on the table, and clean clothes to wear. Mary’s older brothers were gone and not available to help.

Her mother finally returned, so Mary took the bus to Bryan and graduated. There was no family, no photos, and nothing to hold but her hard-earned diploma!

When she returned home, her mother told her that she had to get married because she had too many children at home and her father would never be able to work again. Mary got married and, within a year, had a baby; before the baby was one year old, her aunt helped her escape to New York because of the abuse that she was suffering.

Later, Mary returned to Texas and worked at Denny’s restaurant in Sharpstown. Eventually, she managed several Denny’s restaurants before starting her long and successful career in personnel management in personnel management in the oil and gas industry.

Because she divorced, her mother told her she was no longer Catholic. So, during this time, Mary joined the United Methodist Church and started reading the Bible. She eventually taught third graders and adults in a 42-week Genesis through Revelations class.

In 1991, her daughter joined the military and was stationed overseas. Mary would visit her wherever she was stationed except for the Middle East.

In July of 1992, Mary met Carl at a church dance. He would tell her later that he knew she would be his next wife when he saw her from across the room. Mary’s second conversation with Carl was, “Where do you stand on the Bible?” He had just started attending a Baptist church. Carl joined Mary’s disciple class, and their relationship grew. They were engaged in 1993 at Christmas.

In January 1994, as Mary was preparing for her wedding, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She had surgery and then started chemotherapy. Carl was diagnosed with cancer in April. They pressed on, and they marched on, and they were married in July! Carl’s father had remarried two weeks before, and they joined them on their honeymoon at a bed-and-breakfast in San Antonio. Indeed, that would be a first to have your in-laws join you on your honeymoon, LOL!

It wasn’t long after that Mary’s daughter was married and had a child, Zoe, but the marriage didn’t work out for either parent, and they could not raise the daughter. Zoe came to live with Carl and Mary, and they raised her as their own.

Because they had such a brief honeymoon, Carl always promised that they would travel on vacation during July. They travel the world, taking Zoe with them.

Zoe was very involved in ice skating, earning seven gold medals throughout Texas. Carl’s hobby was golf, anytime and anywhere! Mary was wondering what the Lord would have her do. Her good friend, Fran Steele, asked her to help with the yearbook at Colony Meadows Elementary. Mary agreed and started taking pictures for the annual yearbook. One time, when Mary was walking out of the library, two little girls were waiting for the carpool line and asked her if she would take their picture. Knowing she did not have any film in the camera, Mary agreed to take their picture just for fun! They laughed and carried on. Mary began to realize it does make people happy, and they feel valued when their picture is taken.

Over the years, Mary has been asked to take pictures at charitable events for many organizations across Fort Bend County. She has enjoyed sharing this joyful ministry with her good friend, Liz Furman, and recently with Debra Maltman and Jessica Kij. They enjoy seeing people having a good time and capturing the moment. They have never accepted any monetary funds for taking pictures. They know it’s their way of giving back to the community, so they have enjoyed doing so!

In May 2015, Carl passed away. For the first time, Mary felt like she was treading water. Yeah, she knew God was holding her right hand; she trusted Him, she knew she didn’t have to understand, and that one day she would see her dear, beloved Carl again. At times, she said she would cry her a river; other times, she would dance and laugh when nobody was there!

It hurts, she says, as she wasn’t prepared to be a widow. “The biggest challenge in overcoming being a widow was that I believed I had to make every decision by myself. I was in charge of several family members’ estates and their well-being. I missed Carl’s counsel, his intellect, his kindness.” My sister-in-law, Lisa, was there for me to get administratively organized, which helped!

Also, Carl was well known and respected in the community, and honestly, people wanted to help, so I let them! I am forever grateful!

Today, the advice I would give someone facing this kind of loss is that it is OK to grieve and please become familiar with the process itself. There’s no specific time frame, and it is OK to say, “I’m not capable,” “Not at this time,” or “Can I get back with you.” Listen to wise counsel and consider their advice.

Also, it’s OK to tell friends, “Hey, can I talk to you?” “Can we have lunch?” “Is it OK that I hang with you?”

“Lastly, when I heard about First Colony Church of Christ’s widow program, I thought, YES! We need this. The community needs this! We need to know that we are not alone in this challenging stage of life, and I have enjoyed meeting so many beautiful women! I thank  Pam, Charles, and all the other volunteers who have stepped up to assist and demonstrate their caring hearts for widowers and widowers and establish this extraordinary ministry in our community! Most of all, I thank them for their servant’s heart.”

Interview by Pam Foster

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