The Anatomy Of A Family Pandemic
Families around the world today face pandemic situations when a health pandemic sweeps the globe, which for many feels like the unexplainable, uncontrollable emotion a family feels when losing a loved one.
The Kubler-Ross model of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance are all emotions that surface during such situations, yet there is no particular order or timing of these emotions.
We have known about these five specific emotional responses since Kubler-Ross published their book on death and dying in 1969.
The year 2020 may go down as the worst pandemic in world history. Despite the 24/7 news cycle, some still deny that the pandemic exists. Others are angered by losing their job, health, and freedom. Many are trying to bargain with their reality by saying this problem will only affect someone, not me, and selfishly convince themselves they are more valuable than others. Many become very depressed because of a lack of finances to pay their bills, not counting the loss of social interactions. Many are in denial, and it is only after they accept their reality that things become more apparent. That clarity does not remove the emotional toll, but many times, it lowers the stress and anxiety caused by their situations.
Here are the five stages of grief and their definitions:
Denial or Shock – Protects you from the intensity of loss. This will diminish as you acknowledge what has happened in your world.
Bargaining – Dwelling over what could have prevented your loss. If not resolved, it may hamper the healing process.
Depression – This emotion may cause a lack of sleep and appetite, along with loneliness and crying spells, which are often experienced. If you find yourself unable to talk with others, always wanting to be alone, stop eating or sleeping, are easily angered, sad, lack energy, and concentration or loss of self-esteem, these systems could be severe. If this happens, call for help.
Anger – This emotion can create feelings of abandonment, leading to guilt once you realize your anger.
Acceptance – This emotion will integrate a range of emotions into your life experiences, and then healing occurs.
Information is good, but one surefire way of lowering your stress and anxiety is to turn off the television set. Listening to media designed to create panic and ratings harms your emotional health. The best answer is to turn it on briefly to get instructions and then turn it off.
Global suffering happens, yet in your world, when you experience a death, it is your world that is being affected. In your world, you suffer the loss of your spouse; your world is your complete focus. The pandemic the world is experiencing in 2020 will end, and all of us will survive this global epidemic. For many, the world will continue, but the loss you experienced is personal. When the world heals and moves on, you remain to face your world alone. What then?
Coming to grips with a loss is unthinkable, yet it is a reality of life. You understand that your world just got turned upside down, and you are fighting to bring it upright, and many times, you do not know where to begin. The purpose of this site and others is to help you walk through the process of grief, to understand you are not alone and that you can overcome this tragedy in your life. Do not be afraid to reach out for help. Overwhelming emotions that flood your soul are average. I understand you are not going crazy. Your survival is a testimony to the one you lost to prove you can continue life with meaning and purpose. I say this because, without purpose, life is meaningless. You are important. You are valuable and will one day be more vital for surviving your loss. No one wants to experience what you have experienced, yet everyone will eventually.
SOME SUGGESTIONS:
Make educated decisions with the help of your trusted friend.
Be resilient and look for the inner strength that lives within you.
Give yourself time to grieve, but don’t disconnect from others you trust.
Many fear the current pandemic in America, and others fear continuing life without their mate and facing the unknown. If you have any thoughts of hurting yourself or harming someone else, seek professional help or call 911. Reaching out for extra help is always a smart move.
If you need help and just want to talk with a person who can understand, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline phone number is 1-800-273-8255.
Options for English Speaking 1-800-273-8255 Options for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing 1-800-799-4889 Option for Spanish Speaking – Nacional de Prevencion del Suicidio 1-888-628-9454 Option for Veterans Crisis Line 1-800-273-8255 or Chat with VCL – Text 838255
Do not be embarrassed to call. You are worth saving, and these people will help you.